Show Me Love
by Boyfrom0z
Summary: Kaoru wants to be with Hikaru, but his twin has stopped displaying affection so he confronts him to discover his true emtions. H/K oneshot, T for boy/boy twins...


AN: Like I did with "What's the Name of the Game," I wrote this as a scene between two girls and then changed it around to fit Hikaru/Kaoru. I've never written anything pairing them before, but this seemed too similar to "Name of the Game" to inflict it on Glitch/Cain (of SciFi's "Tin Man"). Anyway, I was listening to t.A.T.u.'s "Show Me Love" as I was writing so there are a few elements of the song in it. I don't think it's that good; it was more of a "must deal with emotions via writing" thing. (No, I have not lived out this scene – just rough times, okay?)

Edit: I did a bit of a rewrite to try to make it more in character for the twins. Thanks for the advice, guys! I hope this is an improvement.

* * *

"If you're going to say you want to be with me, then why don't you act like it?" I muttered.

"What?"

"You were the one who started all this, who was going on about facing our true emotions. If you care about me, why do keep ignoring me? Why don't you show me love?" It was true, all too true. We'd be "together" for a while now, but he kept not talking to me, ignoring me when we were with other people, something he'd never done in the past. It was as if now that he had me he'd didn't have to worry about it. Did he even want me anymore? Had he gotten bored? Hikaru had never had much of an attention span. I wanted to badly to be with him, but if he couldn't even show me what love was...

He watched me, his mirror image, in silence, his face showing only the barest trace of some unidentifiable emotion.

"Take me or leave me, but don't just let me hang in the middle like this," I said quietly, still hardly releasing I'd released the thoughts that had been driving me mad for months until the words were out of my mouth.

"Take you or leave you?" he repeated. "Just one way or the other? You don't care?" His voice was incredulous, angry.

"That's not what I meant," I said quickly, terrified my confession would drive him away.

"Then what did you mean?" he shot at me.

"I meant-." I sighed. "I can't take it. I just can't."

"So you'd rather I leave you, then?"

"Are you even listening to me?" I shouted, the fury and hurt I'd been holding back for too long finally breaking out. "I want nothing more than for you to hold me in your arms, but if all you want to do is mess around with my head, make me think you care and then just ignore me, then I'd rather be alone and know it!" My breathing was heavy and it was too late to stop that words from coming now. It was over. I was just digging myself into a hole and I knew it. He'd never want me after this, but if it had to end, at least it would be on my terms. Not that that was really any comfort.

And he just stood there, watching me. No reaction, no emotion, no anything.

"I _love_ you!" I screamed, hot tears burning my eyes. "I love you, but if you don't want me, then I'd rather be alone. I'd rather be alone," I gasped, as my knees gave way and hit the floor. "Just leave me alone," I whispered. I couldn't believe I was saying it. "Alone" was something I'd never been before because Hikaru had always been there with me, always. "I can't take this." I clenched my eyes tightly shut as my body sunk the rest of the way to the ground. I just curled up there, my body a useless defense against the agony assaulting me at his very presence. I loved him so much it hurt.

He had no idea, no idea. How could he? Just standing there, watching me. He didn't know that his idea of a little fun, leading me on, had been like giving a starved dog a steak, which he devours only to find it full of some horrible, slow-acting poison that kills him agonizingly from the inside out. How could he know that? How could I have known going in to it all those months ago that he would just get bored with me in the end, just sort of forget about me?

I heard my name. "Kaoru."

"Just leave me alone," I muttered.

"Please," he whispered as I heard his knees gently land on the floor beside me. "I don't want to leave you."

"Sure," I muttered not letting myself believe it was the truth.

"I'm sorry I hurt you."

"You have no idea."

"No, I don't."

Why was he agreeing with me? Why on earth was he agreeing with me? He was supposed to say I was being an idiot and that he hated me and that sort of thing. What was going on?

"I was just," he seemed to search for words, "just so confused, so scared. It was all so new and anyone would have said it was wrong and I didn't know what to do. It seemed so much easier to just ignore it and hope it went away. But I can't. I can't. It's too strong, too real. It's part of me and I can't ever escape it."

"Do you want to?" I mumbled.

"Do I-?"

"Escape it?"

"It'd be easier."

"But do you want to?" I persisted.

"I should," he said darkly.

"You're not answering the question."

He sighed. "No."

It took me a moment to even realize what he had said and what it meant. Did he just say that he wanted to be with me? I had spent so long trying to convince myself that it was over in preparation for the moment when he threw me away that I could hardly believe what I had just heard.

"I want to be with you," he said quietly, after a long pause in which I just lay there with my head reeling.

"What?" I finally managed to say.

"I love you," he whispered.

After a few moments I remembered to breathe.

"Kaoru?" He touched the small exposed part of my face with cool fingers. "I thought this is what you wanted..."

"Is this real?" I croaked when I found my voice.

"Yes."

"You aren't just messing with me?"

"Never."

"Okay." I scrunched my eyes tighter shut.

He sat quietly beside me, gently rubbing my back, waiting patiently for me to uncurl and face this new reality. At last I was ready and I slowly raised my body up into a sitting position and looked into his eyes.

"Hey," he said softy.

"Hey," I replied.

For another long moment we just gazed at each other in silence. Then, inexplicably and simultaneously, we both burst out laughing. I flung myself into his arms and clung to him, my laughter running into tears. He clutched my body to his.

"I can't believe this," I choked around my sobs.

"Well believe it 'cause it's for good," he replied, laughter still in his voice.

"I love you."

"I love you too. And this time I won't let you forget it."

As I gazed up into his face, which was so full of love, I knew I could face anything. I also knew I'd have a lot to face, but with Hikaru there beside me, I knew I could do it. I knew I'd never be alone again, never without love.


End file.
